Sex, Love, Anxiety: The Secrets Of Alex Greenwald - Crying In The Dark

6/26/2022

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Crying In The Dark

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View Transcript Alex's Subconscious: Can't sleep, huh?
Alex: No fucking thanks to *you*.

Alex's Subconscious: You realize that literally *all* of this has been your fault, right?
Alex: *MY* fault!?
Alex's Subconscious: YES!
You are *incapable* of having *any* sort of remotely stable relationships!
*When will you learn that*?

Alex: Y-you're *lying*!
Alex's Subconscious: Am I really?
*Look* at yourself, Alex.
*Look* at what you've become.
*You* fucked Sunny.
*You* ruined your last chance at love.
You're nothing but a *failure*, Greenwald!

Alex: *NO*.
Alex's Subconscious: You already live your life in a state of perpetual fear anyway, what's one more?
Alex: *No*.
Alex's Subconscious: Admit it. You're *scared*.
Alex: No.
Alex's Subconscious: You're scared that you'll never find somebody.
Alex: N-no...
Alex's Subconscious: You're scared that you fucked up the *last good thing* that'll *ever* happen to you.

Alex: ...no...
Alex's Subconscious: *YES*.
You're afraid that you're going to die alone.
Because that's not a possibility.
That's a *guarantee*.
And there's *nothing* you can do about it.

Alex (off-panel): L-LISSA!
H-help me...
Lissa: DON'T DO A THING, ALEX, I'M COMING!

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Author Notes

6/26/2022, 11:23 AM As I mentioned in my blog post yesterday, yeah, this is the first ever strip I've done with actual nudity. A lot of thought and consideration went into this strip, and ultimately, this concept for this specific strip made the most sense. Any future instances of nudity in the strip are gonna be few and far between, but believe me, this won't be the last time that this sort of thing happens here.

Also, Alex has always slept topless, that's actually a character detail I created fairly early on but I've never actually shown it in the strip before.

Comments:

6/26/2022, 11:54 AM God, I feel so sorry for Alex. If I'm being honest, I get that internal voice myself sometimes. It was a lot worse a few years ago, but thankfully it has got a lot better. Not exactly the same thing that Alex here is going through, but definitely the "You're a failure," thing. Other top contenders would be, "You can't do anything right," "You're just going to feel miserable all of the time," "Nothing that you do matters," and "You're probably never going to feel true happiness again." Except, maybe even worse so than Alex, because at least they are fighting back to some extent. I, on the other hand, was too tired and emotionally exhausted to do anything but just accept all the negative voices in my head.

Not to bring the whole mood down any more than it already is, but all I'm saying is that I can empathize with Alex a lot here. And I'm really glad that they're able to see how fucked up their mind is enough to go and get help when they need it. As bad as the whole situation is, they were strong and were able to go and try to get help. That's really important with things like this. If you can't trust yourself or if you feel so bad that you want to do bad things to yourself, please get help from someone you love or who you can trust. Or as a last resort, go the hospital or emergency room, or call a hotline or something. Do anything you can to get help.

Sorry for the PSA, it's just something I feel strongly about, and I want everyone to have the chance to feel happy and fulfilled in their lives.

Anyway, this is a very emotional page, and I'd say you nailed it pretty well.
6/26/2022, 11:59 AM Honestly, I think the PSA is kinda necessary here, I don't think I could say any of that any better myself.

Thank you, dude, and I'm so sorry you went through all that. Depression's a bitch.